In Bed with Small Hands: Porn, Pleasure & the Quiet Life

So, imagine you’re literally in bed with a porn star. Not a metaphor. That’s exactly how this season of the podcast kicks off, with Aaron, a musician, adult performer, and better known to the internet as Small Hands.

Aaron's been in the adult industry for over a decade, but porn wasn’t part of the plan. “I was just her boyfriend,” he says of his ex-wife, who was already a director and performer. “And then… I kind of got into the family business.” At first, he thought it’d be a couple scenes. A favor. Twelve years later, he’s still one of the most recognized (and adored) performers out there.

Pornstar Life, OnlyFans Hustle, and Finding His Audience

Aaron only joined OnlyFans during COVID, when mainstream productions paused, and everyone scrambled to figure out what was next. “At first, it didn’t make money. I had to figure out who my audience was.” Spoiler alert: it’s mostly women. “I love everybody,” he says, “but most of my paying fans are women.” Which, in a world that assumes men are the only consumers of porn, is a pretty cool reality check.

And while many adult performers juggle both studio work and fan-based platforms, OnlyFans has become a major income source. “Studios keep your name out there, but OnlyFans is the core.”

Performer vs. Person: Sex On and Off Camera

Aaron’s been a musician since he was 15, and the performance aspect of porn? That clicked. “I learned how to put on a show being in bands,” he says. But real-life sex? “It’s less performative. I can relax. No lighting. I don’t have to suck in my gut.”

He describes himself as a pleaser, someone who reads his partner's energy and responds in kind. "I really like slow, intimate, soft sex... which you don’t always see in the movies." And while his on-screen style is often rough, he insists it’s always based on mutual desire and chemistry. “I'm like a very excited puppy dog,” he laughs. “I get so excited I just want to do everything.”

Monogamy, Porn, and Emotional Boundaries

Aaron may have sex with other people for work, but off camera, he's monogamous. “Work is work. My heart, my soul—that's for one person.” And if he's with someone? No sex outside of work, no casual hook-ups.

When asked if a future partner needs to be in the industry, he’s chill either way. “But if they’re not, they just need to understand how this works.”

Cuddles, Consent & Aftercare

Aftercare is a mixed bag on porn sets. Some scenes are intense, rough and or emotional but once the camera cuts? “I usually let the woman dictate the aftercare,” Aaron explains. “I don’t want to come across as too much. But if they want to sit and decompress, I’m there.”

He acknowledges the oddity: you can do the most intimate things on camera, but cuddling after might feel too vulnerable. “It's not the cuddling, it’s the context.”

The Myth of the Forever-Erection

Let’s clear something up: porn dicks are curated. “You have to prep. Eat right. Sleep well. Know your body. And sometimes, yeah, I need five minutes.” It’s not just whip-it-out-and-go. There’s pressure, cameras, angles, timing. “Some days your dick is like, nope.”

So no, porn isn’t a blueprint for your own sex life. As Aaron says, “You don’t learn how to use weapons from a video game. Porn isn’t sex ed.”

Toys, Dirty Talk & Worship

Aaron and his best friend and frequent co-star Owen Gray are famous for using toys in scenes—especially the magic wand. And yes, they ask every performer before a shoot if they want one involved. “Nine out of ten women say yes.”

Also? Dirty talk. Aaron’s not shy. He studied European performers for their passion and mixed that with roughness from American scenes. The result? “I’m vocal. I use my words. I want it to be believable and hot.” Whether it’s praise, degradation, or somewhere in between, he tailors it to the person. “My whole thing is about desire. When I’m with you, you’re my entire universe.”

Life After the Spotlight

Aaron is recently divorced, taking time for himself, and embracing the quiet life. “Right now, I just want to be simple and happy. Time with my dog, balance, peace.”

That doesn’t mean he’s done with sex, or porn. “If the universe sends someone my way, I’m open. But I’m not rushing it.”

Would he do porn into his 60s? “Maybe,” he laughs. “Be the old hot guy doing porn. Who knows?”

Final Thoughts: It’s All About Connection

Whether on screen or off, Aaron’s philosophy is simple: “Take your ego out of it. Listen. Read your partner. And make them feel like they’re the center of your universe.”

And that, folks, is why so many of us only watch his porn.

You can find Aaron (aka Small Hands):

🔞 OnlyFans: onlyfans.com/smallhands

🎶 Band: Soft Faith on Spotify

📸 Instagram/Twitter: @thesmallhands_

🔍 Pornhub: just type “Small Hands” (you’ll know it’s him)