• Alexa Andre

Most vulva owners need external stimulation to orgasm, but is it actually true?

Disclaimer that this is based on my experience only. Literally just speculating.

Also, this is in no way sponsored, I just love Bellesa as a company and their products.


I was just beginning to study sexuality when I realized that only around 1 in 5 vulva owners can have an orgasm just from penetration. I had always thought there was something wrong with me before that. Since informing myself and being a part of the sex positive community, I see lots of people talking about this statistic and advocating for clitoral stimulation. Which is amazing, because the clit deserves all the attention it can get.


So, good for me, I discovered I'm part of the majority of vulva owners that is only capable of having an orgasm by myself, never with a partner and while stimulating the clitoris. It's been like that all of my life. I have never come by penetration alone. Or I hadn't, until I tried the AirVibe by Bellesa.


It was May 2021 and I got this really cool package by Bellesa so I could host a giveaway with them. I had been wanting to get my hands on their products for over a year, so naturally, I tried them straight away. I began with the Finger Vibe for some external stimulation. It was predictable and nice. I felt adventurous so I gave the AirVibe a try.


This is what it looks like, for those of you who don't know I'm talking about:




As you can see, it has a suction part that's meant for the clit and and internal part that vibrates to stimulate the vagina. This is what we know as a double stimulation toy. But whatever. I tried both settings at the same time to get the full experience. To my surprise, I was feeling something completely different than usual, it was way more internal and profound. I kept going and I had an orgasm.


I was shocked and confused and didn't know from which kind of stimulation I had come. It felt different than all of my previous orgasms but at the same time, I couldn't have internal orgasms. Or could I? I had tried other internal toys and none of them did the trick so I just didn't understand what was happening.


I had to fucking run to my Master's class but as soon as I came back home, I gave it another shot, this time only using the internal part of the toy. I did it again, I had an orgasm.

So... what the fuck? All of a sudden I could orgasm from internal stimulation? Could I always?

Had I just not found the right stimulation?





This is where my theory comes in. I feel like more vulva owners are able to do this, we literally just need to find that perfect angle or stimulation. I'm not saying to go buy that toy because I have no idea if it'll work for you. I'm also not saying that we should stop telling people about the importance of our beautiful clitorises.


I'm saying that you shouldn't stop exploring. Ever. I had had multiple partners and tried multiple toys made for internal stimulation. The only logical conclusion was that I wasn't one of the lucky few that could have internal orgasms (I still only can with that one toy). I know it might be easier for me because I get lots of free toys from what I do, but please don't jump to conclusions so fast and let your body explore different sensations as much as possible.


Stay curious. We all deserve pleasure and amazing orgasms. And I wish them for you.

Have another question?

ask me anything!