Fuck you, Meta.
Now that I got that off my chest. Let me tell you the deets.
My website editor told me to pay for some Facebook Ads and I complied. I've been talking about sexual pleasure for almost 2 years so I already knew that Instagram and Facebook would't approve any of my content.
I still said: "fuck it" and gave it another shot. I designed everything and paid $79 -the lowest amount available- I few hours later I got an email saying that my ad had been denied. I always thought my sex education wasn't violating their guidelines because when I read them (a while ago) I only saw the part where offering "adult" services isn't allowed. So in my head, their AI was flawed and couldn't tell the difference.
But I was curious to see it for myself again. To my surprise, this is what I found:
MUST NOT FOCUS ON SEXUAL PLEASURE.
Excuse me? There's too many things wrong with this that I can't organize my thoughts properly. Bullet points always help:
You think only people over 18 need contraceptive measures? Are you actively trying to have more teen pregnancies? And I'll also mention any kind of sex that has risks, such as oral sex. The average age people have their first intercourse varies by country, but it can be as low as 15 years of age. And before that, people experiment with others forms of sex that also need protection. Maybe this is the reason no one uses dental dams for oral sex.
What the fuck the thing about not focusing on sexual pleasure. So sex is only about reproduction? Can we even talk about consent? Because that connects directly to whether or not you're enjoying a sexual activity.
Sexual pleasure IS sexual health. And this is precisely our mission as sex educators. To make everyone understand the importance of pleasure in your health and sexual wellbeing.
So vaginal dryness is the only reason to use lube? This is what creates myths and shame around people that regularly use lube for WHATEVER reason. Btw, you should always use lube, no matter how "wet" you might be.
Facebook is getting rebranded and... aren't we supposed to be able to do about anything in the metaverse? Why is Meta being advertised as "the future" if it can't even accept the most natural act in the whole planet. Most of us are here because someone had sex. Hopefully, they enjoyed it too. I'll give the entire company some much needed workshops if it means getting to do what I love in peace.
This is my work, my passion and my source of income. This work is important, needed and doesn't harm anyone, hell, it actually does good. It changes people's lives even. Let's stop pretending that no one had sex and that no one is interested in it. It's fucking 2021 and I'm scared to type "sex" on Instagram. No.
I just can't. This just happened and I decided to write it now that it's fresh and I'm angry and passionate about the subject. It's so hard for sex educators, therapists, researchers and even advocates to spread the information that everyone deserves. We rely solely on organic growth and the support of our audiences. It gets frustrating. But we'll continue to fight. I'm glad I'm still here and you are too.